A look at the Britney Spears Biopic

When you say Britney Spears, everyone from your parents to your great-uncle Bernie will know who you are talking about. She doesn’t even need a last name, saying Britney is enough to know who we are talking about. She is a pop culture icon, whether or not you like it. Because she has led such an interesting life and because we all witnessed her highs and her lows, Lifetime, an American channel which creates trashy tv programmes aimed at women, decided it was a fantastic idea to make a biopic about Britney. Unauthorized of course, because why the hell would Britney lend her lifestory to a company like that?

A few days ago, the first images from the biopic were leaked and of course we wanted to provide you with our sassy commentary and let you decide. Will you watch this trainwreck or not? You decide!

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This is supposed to be Britney. Despite the fact that she wears Britney-esque clothes and has blond hair, nobody in their right mind will think: “Oh my lord she looks so much like Brit! She is the right person for the job!” The fact that I have brown hair does not make me suitable to play Angelina Jolie in a biopic about her life, even though my lips are also quite big. Anyway, either she was the only one who showed up to the auditions, or the casting directors were momentarily blind. Sure, she seems nice enough but looks nothing like Britney.

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Not even with sunglasses on does she remind anyone of Britney. Once again, blond hair does not equal Britney Spears. And holy fuck is that supposed to be Justin Timberlake? Do not tell me there wasn’t a single person in the United States who resembles JT even a little bit more than this dude. Now they are taking the piss. It can’t get worse than this, can it?

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Okay, so this is supposed to be Britney at her wedding with Kevin Federline. At least the dude slightly resembles Kevin. But apart from that, who believes this shit? Let’s take a look at an original photo from their wedding:

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I mean, where the hell is her tiara? You cannot pretend to be Britney and then leave out the iconic tiara. This is such a shame. Plus, could they really not find a sleeveless wedding dress? It is like they didn’t even try.

Okay fine, well we’ve seen the worst now, haven’t we? No…what do you mean?

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Holy hell! Who are they supposed to be? N*Sync? Hahahaha no. Seriously? What in the world did N*Sync do wrong to deserve this portrayal? The guy on the left seems way too excited to be there and looks like he is tickling the guy next to him who can barely stop smiling. The guy who I suppose is portraying Justin Timberlake looks like he is about to have a heart attack and the other two take this way too seriously. Where did they even find these people? I mean, compare them to the original fabulous five:

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This, This is blasphemy.

It is not a surprise that Britney will not help them create this mess and has not given her blessing. Let’s be honest, who would? There are so many questions I have. Like why? And why in the world is this necessary? And who will even watch this? And why? Argh!

Will you watch it? Let us know!

 

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Ingrid is the twenty-something owner of The Sassologist, who loves everything that has to do with pop culture. While she is one of many who is in the process of writing a novel, she is also currently in denial over not being a witch. Her Hogwarts letter has yet to arrive. In the meantime she writes about pop culture and dreams about unicorns.

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